There are plenty of things that grows better in time. The full richness of a gloriously ruby red wine, the looks of certain boringly plain ugly boys into gorgeous handsome husbands 😉 , deliciously matured steaks, that pair of shoes that has adapted and taken on the exact mould of your feet, and friendship….
Under the wikipedia description of friendship, they state amongst other things : Value that is found in friendships is often the result of a friend demonstrating the following on a consistent basis:
-The tendency to desire what is best for the other
-Sympathy and empathy
-Honesty, perhaps in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth, especially in terms of pointing out the perceived faults of one’s counterpart
-Mutual understanding and compassion; ability to go to each other for emotional support
-Enjoyment of each other’s company
-Trust in one another
-The ability to be oneself, express one’s feelings and make mistakes without fear of judgement.
This weekend I attended my friend’s 40th birthday celebration. Her best friend that she has known since childhood was there. It was fabulous to see such an unbelievably genuine display of friendship between two people.
There is a saying that goes; “blood is what makes you a relative, a relationship is what makes you family” How true! Friendship forms like a precious pearl. Layer upon layer of mother-of-pearl, coat a grain of sand until the iridescent gem is formed.
Friendship is exactly the same, layers of trust and appreciation, love, acceptance, life experiences, fun, laughter, sadness, support and so much more add to a relationship that bonds you together tighter than blood.
Reflecting on my friendships past and present, I must admit that I don’t make a very good friend. My best friend from high school still remains like family to me, but I realize that I don’t confide in her or anyone else for that matter. I don’t share my sadness or stresses, my fears or worry. I do however feel that if you are truly bonded as friends there would be no need, your friend will know when you are in distress or in need of support and you wouldn’t have to say anything. They will be there when you need a good cry, laugh when you laugh, aid you without being asked.
According to my husband – which I might add is a very good judge of character – most of my friends do not have my best interests at heart, and most are not truly supportive of my endeavors. I am an honest friend to them though, and I do give my opinion and support honestly. I am truly bad at keeping contact, so to the friends I neglect, I’m sorry. I always feel judged by friends, but I remain true to who I am. So according to the definition of value in friendship, I fail miserably at being a good friend.
I am grateful for the friends I have that I know are supportive and that leaves me with a smile and warmth in my heart…they may not be that many, but I will treasure them.
It is times when you witness a great bond of friendship and where you “feel” the connection between people that you want to be a better friend.
True friendship is so preciously beautiful.