Last night snug in bed I reflected back on what has undoubtedly been the most difficult past year of my life. I had to make some very difficult decisions and choices. Made some really bad mistakes. Hurt people. Disappointed people.
And then I thought…
It has been a difficult road, but my decisions ultimately define me. My choices were not made without thought. When you know who you are as a person, you don’t need to explain every choice, or make excuses for every decision. The array of words used by people to express what they thought of my choices and my character would be perfectly suited for a roasting episode on TV.
Initially I felt hurt by the insulting words or the “it says so much about the person she is” kind of phrases, but I knew without any doubt, that the people who truly know me, know my essence as a person, they would eventually see past the cloud of words thrown around to give drama to my story.
Time has passed, I have had no need to explain, no need to contradict false truths, convenient lies. I’m surrounded by people who love me, who are true friends with no hidden agendas. People I can laugh with and be comfortable with. People that do not break others down, or gossip, or give snide remarks, or discuss others good fortune with disgust. There is something precious about the love, trust and unity of good friends and family.
I have been blessed with many new friends, many new experiences and new possibilities ahead. There are always days when it takes a little bit more motivation to get out of bed, but I know that today is precious and for living. That definitely makes getting out of bed much easier :).