The journey starts

With my eldest daughter starting her first year at Uni this week and my youngest starting year 10, our conversations are often about direction and the future. Where they want to be, what they want to achieve and how they want to steer themselves in the right direction to get to their goals.

Something I often tell them in our discussions about friends or challenges, is to identify what they do not want, and what they do not like. It may seem somewhat negative, but I strongly believe that identifying what you do not like in any situation or in yourself, can help you to focus on what you do want to do.

Establishing your values, and knowing what your opinions are and having the conviction to stand by them. Entering the work force where focus is so centred on profit and performance, it could be challenging finding value in what you do every day. Work can become a soul draining experience to put food on the table.  

I want them to find their purpose, fail and try again, and fail and try again.. until they find their fire, and I want them to find a company to work for who’s values align with theirs. It pains me when people can’t see past their paycheck. You will always have that in any company, people being there just because they have to be. Frustratingly ignorant, complaining but never taking the time to ask the right questions. They don’t take the time to understand the corporate strategy, they don’t take the time to ask how decisions are made, they don’t ask about profit margins, have no idea of the growth strategy and where they fit in. 

I want my girls to question, to be curious and ask those questions. To go seek the value they can bring to any job they enter into after having knowledge of the company they have chosen. Knowing their purpose and knowing how they fit into the much bigger puzzle of adding value and service. I want them to work hard and be forward thinking. And most of all, I want them to be kind. Life will have many challenges and hard conversations. You don’t have to be an ass to get your way. People…all people, are valuable. 

There are too many people chasing a big paycheck and far too few people finding purpose and fulfillment in what they do. 

My wish for them is to live a life of purpose.

And so .. the first one’s journey begins.

Keep it simple

My mom’s birthday has come and gone, along with another father’s day. This year was a bit better, maybe it’s in part because I know I will see them in a couple of months…

Drove home tonight and finally sent my baby sister a voice note. I don’t do too well with Skype… seeing family and not being able to touch them is still too hard. Got home feeling exhausted and saw a message.

In that moment where I heard her message…and voice, I felt like I just wanted to be home. To go home and just sit and have a glass of wine with my mom and relax. No pressures to do more or do better or to move house or to stay or too make friends or or or…

Just something simple.

To do list…survive another year

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Apparently it takes two years to adjust…twelve months seem like a really long time and it is.  a Year ago we were scrambling around getting all our things in order for our trip. It feels like it was just the other day. There are those moments where you so desperately miss family that it feels like forever, where the gap suddenly closes nearly shut and you remember the wave of emotions felt as if it was yesterday,  you realize just how long it has been and how far away you are from the familiar warm embraces that you loved and now miss.  It is surreal and you know it is not just a simple hop in the car and a drive down the road to go catch up.

I often check my Facebook and look at my nearby friends just to see that everyone I want to spend time with is 12000km away. I keep checking as if that gap would magically close and become smaller but it never does.  Meeting new people and seeing them on there does not quite help just yet. In our rush to get on with things, work and trying to balance several other things we find very little time to make new friends. I definitely miss having someone pop over for a glass of wine or visiting family. It is the single hardest thing to adjust to.

Sometimes you drive in your car and see someone that resemble somebody you know and for a split second you want to believe they are magically there but then you realise you are just being stupid and they are not. It is weird how you carry the smell of someone with you, you can’t smell them but you know their scent and you just want a hug and to be surrounded by the familiarity of that smell… the smell of mom or dad, the feeling of dad’s stubble against your cheek… I miss it, it’s hard.

My boss and her family moved here when she was my daughter’s age, I also work with her brother and he was only six when they moved. Listening to him speak about their experience gives me hope. They started over and they are fine, they are all well, seem like a lovely close knit family, successful with a bunch of gorgeous kids. I’m really hoping my kids will look back one day and feel that we did something good for them. I honestly hope I will look back and feel I did something good for me.

Hopefully we will make some friends along the way and hopefully I can sip a glass of wine with a good friend that will get me and laugh at my stupid jokes. For them moment I do not feel feel like celebrating the last year that has passed.